The Most Precious Thing I Ever Lost

I have lost a lot in the 45 years I have been on this earth.  I have lost family members to death. I lost my virginity in a drunken stupor (for the record – not the way to go).  I have lost babies.  I have lost pets.  I have lost all kinds of paperwork, jewelry, memorabilia, and just general stuff.  But the most precious thing(s) I have ever lost are memories.

My husband has an AMAZING memory!  He can remember events that happened to him when he was a toddler and he uses those memories to tell amazing stories and keep boy2 and boy3 enthralled with tales of boyhood, adventures during life in the military and funny stories about when the boys were little.  Boy2 has inherited that from his dad and I can already see the makings of a great actor or writer in him.

Me, on the other hand…


…I can barely remember where I was last week sometimes.

My one and only Princess Bride reference: “Fezzik, jog his memory”

The memories I miss most though are of those with my parents, grandparents, and kids.

My mom died when I was 21.  She was 40.  I had just had girl1 nine months before and through that experience Mom and I had finally learned to communicate and like each other and be friends.  Such a huge difference from when I was a teenager.  I can only remember a few of the good times, and nothing from when I was a kid.  I have tried to conjure up great stories to tell the kids – but I can’t.  I remember that mom was a great singer, loved to have a scotch (JW Red Label) and water when she got home from work every day, and was so proud to be a grandmother.  She loved girl1 and had great plans to spoil her, but…..

My dad is still alive and kicking.  Since my parents divorced when I was five, most of my memories of dad involve driving half-way for visits.  I have lost so much of the time with him.  The good thing is that I have been able to watch Daddy make memories with my little boys over the past few years and it has been phenomenal.

The number of memories I have lost are too numerous to mention here.  The great thing that I hold onto is that even though I have lost all the memories I have never lost the knowledge that I am and was deeply loved.

So we are off to make new memories.  My prayer for boy2 and boy3 is that they can hold on to all the memories we are making as a family now and that the new experience of living abroad will not only strengthen their hearts, but expand their minds.  My desire for me is to hold on to all the memories I have left, and find some of the lost ones again, so  I can write a blog post in the future about the most precious thing(s) I ever found.

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